Many people are dealing with existential dread this week as the west coast of the US is on fire. Millions of people are trapped in their homes and untold secondary consequences are sure to occur. I knew this was coming and am not surprised.

In 2014(?) my brother argued that man made global warming wasn't real and pointed to resources that argued against it. I followed the people behind those sources for awhile and determined they were in every case blinded by confirmation biases. They were constantly engaging in the same behavior and thinking they accused the other side of. Months of research led to zero concrete evidence that human-caused climate change was not real.

Concluding that human-caused climate change was definitely real led me down the path to install solar in my home and get an electric car. All told I invested the majority of my work bonuses for 3 years into significantly de-carbonizing our family. I traded in a car I loved to go electric. I wanted to get a Model 3 but cancelled the pre-order when I didn't know when the car would come. It didn't make sense to wait purely for my personal desire.

I generally looked to the IPCC report for guidance on the effects of global warming but was worried about how little we understood. Many other sources looked at rain averages vs damaging impact of higher variability around the mean. We could clearly see the difference in Los Angeles as heavy rains turned mountains green and then yellow shortly thereafter. How much rain was irrelevant to the fire risk. We also clearly didn't understand how the ocean was warming and the impact that would have.

At some point I stumbled upon what had happened in the Permian Extinction. Over 70% of land life and 95% of sea life were wiped out over the course of thousands of years. Learning more about it established a clear mental model in my head. If we burn all of the fossil fuel in the ground, then we're likely to see a 10 degree Celsius temperature rise and kill of most of the life on earth. And that is over thousands of years. Accelerate the pace of change and it could be worse.

That mental model means I am not going to be surprised by anything that comes from global warming. Who knows what the tipping point really is. Who knows how local climate will be impacted. Who knows how bad things like thunderstorms, hurricanes, tornadoes, etc. will get because they don't show up in the fossil records. As bad as it gets I will always have an expectation that it could get worse.

So why am I hopeful? Because earlier impacts will lead to earlier actions. Painful impacts in the US are more likely to lead to change than if they had occurred elsewhere. I know how we can adapt and manage the impacts. Humans have a tremendous capacity to adapt as individuals and societies. History shows that nature is bound to destroy life itself at some point in the future. Only humans can prevent that from happening. Being forced to face the truth and deal with existential threats earlier is a good thing.

It was my son's birthday this week and I had some work to do this weekend (was I catching up or trying to get ahead of the week? it is hard to tell these days). I made sure to spend some quality time with both of the children this weekend and confirm they were doing OK. They seemed oblivious to the fact that the world is on fire and the significance of the record breaking heat we had. The emotional weight of it all is exhausting. They were happy though. Wish I could say the same. At least I can still enjoy the little things like pride in my work, learning, taking care of myself, taking in beauty and the fleeting joys of parenting. And hope for a better future. I wonder if any previous generation had to deal with the weight of leaving a worse world for their children than the one they inherited? Is there still a chance to turn it around? Can future technological progress offset how much we screwed up the climate, energy preparedness (when can we get off fossil fuels completely without killing people in the process?) & health? Thinking a lot about religion and the role it has played in getting humans this far.

This week I just ran out of gas and forgot to write. I scheduled a dinner for my son's birthday on Saturday. He wanted to watch the planes at Van Nuys airport, but that restaurant wasn't open. I thought an outdoor dining experience by Santa Monica airport would be a good replacement. It wasn't. I don't think we'll be eating out again for awhile and I doubt we'll make the special trip there again. I was so worried about my son and my family I forgot to check to see what I would eat there. I made the wrong choice and ended up in pain later. We drove down the coast to enjoy a beautiful sunset at Point Dume. The kids were so happy and the scenery was so beautiful I savored my time there despite the pain. I was in no position to write after that. Sunday left no time for writing as I spent most of the day working. 

I didn't even think about what I would write this past week. There was too much to do. After attending my first PTO meeting I felt like I needed to do something to help out. I spent hours discovering how broken that system was. Parent organizations are all so fractured and disjointed there is no concerted effort to come together. I spent hours looking for a sample survey to send out to get feedback from parents. No luck in the national PTA, California PTA, various PTO groups, Los Angeles parent groups, etc. I went looking for the survey the LAUSD put out in June and they never published the full results publicly. They only shared what they wanted to. It is all so broken.

I volunteered to lead the survey efforts myself. We'll see where that goes. I can do the work myself, but I can't fix anything on my own. It has to be a community effort. 

I was a little broken myself after getting the news of Chadwick Boseman's passing on Friday. That hit me harder than I expected. Reading about what he meant to people. Watching him speak at events I hadn't seen before. Seeing the clear reflection, thoughtfulness, caring and pain in everything he did. In death he inspired me to max out my donation to the Biden/Harris campaign. In sharing that on Twitter I inspired at least one other person to do the same. Maybe if we all just work a little bit harder to fix things it won't be so broken. I hope so.